Self Love

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When something bothers me it’s hard to get it off my mind. I have to talk about it with the people closest to me.  I enjoy and  value social media in the way that it gives everyone the opportunity to express themselves, the same way I feel about fashion. Sometimes it’s hard to differentiate people’s intentions, however.  When you look through the filters and the captions, is the real person behind all of it?

 

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Staying genuine to who I really am is important to me, but I’m sure I could be perceived differently than that because perception is subjective. And being an influencer is also important to me, but the message I want to convey is not be like me, but find yourself and how beautiful it is to be original and unique.  Self love is often the hardest to find, I speak from experience. I see and have seen so many people I love in my life go through the same struggle and it is one that never actually ends.

 

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I love inspiring people. Outside of the cyber world I talk about my clothes, give advice to my loved ones and try to live my best life. I never want that to end, I feel it’s part of my purpose here.

 

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I am wearing Zara shorts, F21 duster and H&M booties

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kitchen Selfies

Two things to know about me are one, I do not own a full length mirror and two, I always take advantage of good lighting.

Having dinner plans with an old friend forced me out of my t-shirt and yoga pants I had been hanging out in all day due to the plague I finally kicked.  I’ve been on a pretty tight budget the last several months and couldn’t really afford to buy anything new.  I love to retire things from my wardrobe for a while in anticipation that they will breathe new life again one day.

I bought these pants a couple years ago. They are the most comfortable pants I have ever worn and can hide any food baby or bloated belly without making me feel constricted (perfect for grabbing dinner in). I thrifted this little cut off charmeuse top from Buffalo Exchange a handful of years ago. It was my virgin trip to the second hand boutique in Brooklyn and have been a frequent shopper ever since.

SO, I guess you could say I am not the type of person to give something a toss if I haven’t worn it in a year.  I grow attached to my clothes and think of them as little treasures that carry many backstories as to how they got into my possession. And in times of needing to feel fresh and new I know I have an archive I can head to first.

I love feeling comfortable and tend to go to layering my basics to add some detail to a pretty simple outfit.

Wearing BCBGeneration pants, top is thrifted from Buffalo Exchange

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Escape to Yaddo

Never take for granted the places just beyond your backyard. The gardens at Yaddo have become one of my favorite places to visit when I need to have a date with my mind or some peace from everyday stressors. Originally a home to the Trask family, they decided to dedicate the property to artists and creative minds.  Although the public is allowed to visit the gardens, admission to the mansion and residency is only open to artists, writers, photographers, composers and choreographers who must go through an application process.

A home for the mind to simply be itself; free and open to all possibilities outside of the realms we are taught.  A place so close to me dedicated to art and beauty that I have the privilege of visiting and riding its energetic wave will not be taken for granted. And although I may complain about being here in Upstate New York, I always remind myself of the many redeeming qualities that are just beyond my door.

Wearing Free People dress and Modern Vice boots

I encourage anyone who loves the outdoors, the arts, and travel to visit their website to learn more about Yaddo’s history and its artists here.

Sk-nek-ta-dee (Schenectady)

At golden hour I was compelled to drive to the new city on the Mohawk River in Schenectady. I had been visiting the site since it was a construction ghost town and couldn’t wait for it to come alive.

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 All this new energy draws me in like a moth to the light.  I took these pictures of the empty stores, some of which have been claimed by businesses, but most are empty and unfinished. I love the anticipation of something new.

IMG_3909I’m excited for a new restaurant in particular, Druther’s, which is a small brewing company started in Saratoga, New York and has now opened their third location here on the Harbor.  Since my birthday is a couple days away I figured this would be the spot to grab a celebratory dinner and drinks.

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IMG_3961Everything that is grand reminds me of  New York City.  I mentioned in my post “On the Pier” my favorite spot, The Boat Basin, which was a marina and restaurant right on the Hudson River. I brought anyone who visited me to that spot and rode bikes on the Hudson River Greenway to get there, so the new Mohawk Harbor already feels like a piece of home to me with so many familiarities. Also, Schenectady has a brand new train station just a few hours from my beloved NYC.

Something New

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Wearing Free People sweater under BCBGeneration dress with Frye boots

As things change in my life whether they are unexpected or even possibly for the better, it is always a shocking reminder that life is not necessarily in my control.  Having moved back to my dreamy little farm in upstate New York, I do miss the livelihood of the city and the ever changing faces around me. Learning how to embrace change still presents a challenge to me.  I love it don’t get me wrong, I crave it honestly but I still struggle because although I may see into what is changing, I can never truly predict the future.

Since I love change so much I thought I needed a drastic change and got my hair cut.  I used to have bangs when I was a pre-teen and hated them.  Now, at 26 I love myself a lot more and embrace how my body, face and hair have changed over the years. I feel like a new person and I can still kind of see that little girl deep inside learning to love herself too.

Winter here has been so mild it doesn’t actually feel like winter.  Today marks the ten year anniversary of when I brought my horse, Hunter, home.  I remember how snowy and icy it was then and now I’m wearing a thick sweater and tights, barely feeling the elements. I’m not complaining but I do hope it snows before the holidays.

Red Walls and Warm Temps

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Wearing Vintage Levis jacket | Truly Madly Deeply top | BCBG skirt | Steve Madden mules 

The weather has been unseasonably warm here in upstate New York. Usually around this time of year I’m wearing the a coat, so to be bare-legged and feel comfortably warm is beyond ordinary.  Keeping a light denim jacket by my side is perfect for when the sun goes down and the temperatures begin to drop again. I snagged this Levi’s jacket in New York City at a flea market. I just could not pass it up; I tend to find the best things when I’m not really looking.

For now, I’m happy to soak up the sun and swim in the colors of fall on this sunny Sunday afternoon.

Thoughts into Words

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Wearing Guess Denim | Zara Boots | Zara Top | Jacket gifted

Remember what it was to be young and hopeful. Always try to hone that feeling in. In the last few years so much has changed in my adult life. I continue to struggle with what it is exactly I want to do or be as an adult, because my unconventional self cannot fit into the molds provided for me. I see myself surrounded by love and light in my present and my future so how do I live day to day with the struggles of my reality without clouding this beautiful perception? The amount of debt, hours worked and countless odds and ends to fix, address and complete stack up against me. I try to peer through the mist, the vines entangling my imagination of the best life possible for me and the people I love. I get small windows of clarity that keep me going, that remind me and help me recognize and re familiarize the truth within. The truth in this life is to remain compassionate to all, embrace what is life and not the things in it.

Highs and Lows

Wearing Zara at the Chelsea Piers

Name a dream that you had that came true. I remember when I was 10 I wished for an orange kitten and what do you know, after my 11 birthday me and my sister each got to pick a kitten, dad was mad but who can resist two curly-headed daughters with hopeful tears in their eyes when the hay farmer says he’s got kittens.

I felt like I had a power in me from a young age to get what I desired, if I put my mind to it. I got into the college I had always dreamed of, the most beautiful horse I had ever seen was all mine. One thing for certain is those events did not happen like some fairytale, I worked so hard to get into FIT and had a lot of hardships and turns in the road. And that horse I got? He was dumped at an auction unloved by his previous owner. The moment I met him he was angry and struck the wall when I said hello. We have an amazing connection now, he gave me the world and now I leave him behind on my family farm to grasp another dream, to live in New York City.

I tend to seek water when I’m in need of reflecting on my thoughts. This week has been a week of highs and lows, quite literally.  The weather did that whole let’s change seasons in twenty-four hours thing again. It was 65 degrees and then just like that we snapped back to subzero temperatures. The water is peaceful, vast, ever-changing; like life. The fluidity helps me to understand the drastic changes that can happen in the span of a week, like a promotion at work (I’m so excited) and helping someone find their dog who ran away. Everything in life is relevant to what you seek.

 

 

When it’s too Cold, Drink Coffee

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Sweater: Free People | Top: Zara | Jeans: Guess | Shoes: Steve Madden

I love the freedom of this city, when you catch the right wave of energy it feels like an incredible breath of fresh air, a massive push in the right direction.  Plans can change in an instant.  I am in charge of my personal legend, every day has a story, come join me on this beautiful adventure…

New York has a funny way of giving us all four seasons in one week. The good thing about that is being spoiled with some warm sunshine, so much so I had bare arms the other day. On the down side the flu is in full force and I fell victim to it last week. All I can say is I am so happy to be in the light at the end of the tunnel and just in time to enjoy these last few days I have off from work.

I was excited to wear these shoes I snagged for quite the steal.  I saw them a couple months ago when they first came out and immediately needed them.  Reluctantly, I waited because I knew I would have them when the time was right, and voila here they are.  Velvet is a huge trend right now and how cool is it that they’re this beautiful blush color. Spring is all about transitioning and this shoe has transition all over it. I’m a little too eager for spring and Mother Nature had me confused yesterday with a beautiful 70 degrees and light breeze.  Today was not so forgiving, so I threw in the towel on my plans to adventure and settled with the idea of sipping on a hot chai tea in this cozy restaurant I found just down the street from my apartment.

Cabin Fever

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Outfit: Jeans Guess | Top BCBG generation | Sweater Free People | Boots Aldo

Now is that time of year where i can’t wait to get up and get outside, the only thing holding me back is the winter weather New York has been having.  Being a native to New York, I am well aware that winter generally lasts through March, but around this time every year I start to crave sunshine and greenery.  I can feel the slight changes in the atmosphere as spring tries to move in,  the days are finally longer with the sun casting light until 5:30pm (yay!). Believe it or not I can actually hear spring birds singing in the city, something I thought was only an upstate privilege, but city birds sing too. I thought I dressed warm enough, covering all parts of my body with thigh high boots and a super cozy sweater, but only 10 minutes out the door and a blast of arctic air that swept my beenie right off my head, I darted right back to my cozy studio.  Maybe next time…